I am back from vacation and confirming Cheesemonger book events today. You can check out the confirmed ones on my events page (working on the additions and the links… Bookstores, don’t get mad if you are not there yet).

Hope to have a real, cheese-based, non-promotional entry soon. But hey, I guess I have kind of a tour scheduled here:

Sonoma, Berkeley, San Francisco, Petaluma, Corte Madera, Mendocino, Portland, Olympia, Bellingham, Seattle… here I come.

Pescadero, Chico, Santa Rosa, I hope to have dates soon.

Midwest, I’ll see you in the Fall.

New York, and the East… you are unscheduled as yet. Blame the Fancy Food Show for turning down my panel proposal. (Heh, maybe if more than 4 people had shown up last time I was on a panel…)

I have to get back to the Food Show, but hey, I got an awesome review from Jeanne Carpenter on “Cheese Underground” blog.

Not only does she call me the Barbara Mandrell of the cheese counter, but who could ask for better praise than this:

I bought and sped read his book last week as a writing assignment for a magazine and have to admit I was not looking forward to it, as I’ve really started dreading reading cheese books. Most of the cheese guides hitting the book stores these days are full of pretentious verbiage written by people who assume that by reputation alone, they are THE authority on cheese.

Not Gordon.

I’m totally gonna start putting peanuts in my Coke.

Hey everybody, I have gotten word that the pre-ordered books are shipping (at least from Chelsea Green). I know some of you have had them pre-ordered since September 2008, so just know they will likely be in your hot, little hands by early next week. Thanks for being so patient.

I set up a facebook for the book to keep people updated on
Cheesemonger: ALOTW events. Events will also be posted on Gordonzola.net

As always you can order direct from Chelsea Green, from Amazon, or pre-order from the bookstore of your choice (like your neighborhood worker-cooperative perhaps)

Sorry for such an all-business post. I’ll return to more sarcasm and mockery soon. After all, the Fancy Food Show is next week… how can I resist?

Not to make anyone jealous, but this was our x-mas cheese plate.

From the top left going clockwise: Bufala Casatica (Buffalo Brie come around the outside! Around the outside!*), Cowgirl Mt Tam, Jasper Hill Bayley Hazen Blue, Coach Farm Triple Cream Goat, Lazy Lady Sweet Emotion**, A Swiss Alpage*** cheese so rare and expensive that I immediately forgot its name, Marieke Gouda with Foenegreek.

And since we’re showing home movies, here are my lasagnas:

(These are filled with Bellwether Jersey Ricotta, by the way. Good ricotta is the secret to good lasagna.)

And here is the Dutch Oven that Santa brought us (so colorful that it makes our oven look really bad. No criticism accepted unless you too live in an apartment where turning on the oven is your main source of heat)

I’d show you the pot roast that Stagey cooked but I took the photos too close and they look more like turds than tasty meat.

Oh wait, here’s what was left of a 7 lb roast (spoon for scale):

What cheese did you serve for the holidays?

*
**This article has the awesomest cheesemaker quote ever. Take heed wanna-be back-to-the-landers: ““No friends, no social life. My only other communication is with other cheese makers. And the farmers’ market.”
***Alpage means it’s from the highest elevation the Alpine cows are grazing at, considered the best, richest, tastiest milk of the year.

Wow. I have to admit that after my experience with the publisher-who-was-supposed-to-publish-my-book-last year-but-never-did, I didn’t really expect my book to come out when Chelsea Green (my current publisher) said it would. And it won’t. No, It’s coming out early!

Very soon, in fact… less than three weeks! In time to be available at Eco-Farm one of the best organic-oriented farming conferences in the country. I don’t know if I can make it down there, but my book will!

I also have a whole slew* of events (bottom right corner of page) coming up. Dudes, I have to admit I’m getting nervous.

Holy crap, that’s me!

*I always want to say “slough” of events. It seems more evocative. Especially if you’ve spent any time at all in, or on, an actual slough.

As always you can order direct from Chelsea Green, from Amazon, or pre-order from the bookstore of your choice (like your neighborhood worker-cooperative perhaps)

Hey there. Perhaps I should have mentioned that I wouldn’t be posting in the last couple of weeks of 2009. Cheese enthusiasts are forgiven for not assuming that, but cheese professionals should have expected it. After all, between the food holidays and New Year’s parties, no person who really works in cheese retail has any free time.

Year after year I am surprised by vendors, reps and cheesemakers who try to conduct business during the last two weeks of the year. The best thing I can say about them is that they are bored and trying to find something to do. But seriously, every year some people try to call me up/drop by to talk about non-timely matters. Do they not understand that I am trying to sell their cheese for them?

Even the best-laid holiday staffing plans fall apart. Every year there is illness, family emergencies, (drunken) accidents, vacations etc. If those things have no happened to me personally, be assured that they have felled other members of our department. We have to cut (roughly) $10,000 worth of cheese a day this time of year just to keep pace and that is while doing about 5 times as much hands-on customer service. I don’t wanna hear about anything not directly related to that until January 2.

Three weeks ago: The backstock is overflowing!

The following is a list of acceptable reasons for cheese professionals further back in the distribution chain to contact a cheese retailer at the end of December:

1. Changes to delivery schedules
2. Bringing in emergency replenishment of stock
3. Amazing deals that need to be bought right away
4. Bringing in presents: chocolate, booze, cheese, or holiday cards
5. Personal shopping

Seriously. That’s it.

A few years ago a certain rep turned up at the store the day before Thanksgiving. That is traditionally the biggest day of the year for grocery retail. Our little prep area was jammed with workers. The customers were elbowing each other out of the way to get to the counter. At least 5 different cheese conversations were going on. This rep walked in – completely oblivious to the commotion — a started talking to me, actually interrupting someone who was asking me what kind of Gruyere she should buy. My co-workers had to push past her to get to the cheese case. She was all, “Hi there, I brought you a schedule of promotions for February. Can we discuss them?”

I looked at her. I took a deep breath and – despite the fact that she was the only rep I had who often came through with free Niners tickets for me and my co-workers – I said, “Get out of here! Don’t come back til January! Look around you. What are you thinking?”

She looked surprised but backed off, murmuring some kind of sales rep pseudo-apology as she left. I was immediately re-engulfed in customers.

I don’t actually know what happened to her. Either she lost her job or got transferred to a different region (not because of me! I never mentioned this to anyone until now) but I never saw her in the store again .I’ve never gotten any more free football tickets either. But it was worth it.

Timmy, the P’tit Basque shepherd, gets in the holiday spirit. See how he is at home, in his apartment, and not visiting retailers:

Well, I guess I’m a little hung over from last night’s worker party. Still, I come to the internet to bring you the most impressive creation in the history of cheese. Behold the snowman made of chevre:

No, I didn’t create this, my co-worker Sarah (warning: music starts right away on link) did.

The snowman looks very sad because our party was at Annie’s Social Club which is closing down after New Year’s Eve. Goodbye Annie’s… we will miss you very much.

The SF Weekly had me write a little year-end, Best of Cheese, top 5 for the online food section. Probably not news if you’ve been reading here, but they used my “415 represent!” picture. Thanks John!

Here’s the linky-link.

Let me note first that Redwood Hill Farm is producing some of their best cheese ever. The last batch of Camellia we got was stunning, unlike any I had eaten previously. They were pungent, onion-y, and tasted French. I know this because for some reason we had a lot of French tourists in the store and most refused to believe it was made in California.

In addition, they are making a bigger version of Camellia called Cameo: about double the size and with decorative stuff on the outside. The Cameo we have gotten — while less strong than this last batch of Camellia — has been better than any Camellia of the last couple of years, texturally much oozier and with a tastier rind.

The Cameo has been in short supply, however. Because of this, yesterday our distributor made a point of telling me that they they had a couple of cases for our order today. She said, “We have Cameo.”

I said, of course “Word up!”

Silence made me realize that the person taking the order was much younger than me and I just sounded like an old guy trying to sound hip. I said, “Uh, you don’t know that song, do you? It’s probably a little before your time… Search for Cameo and “Word Up” on youtube… Let’s just move on”

I’ve been listening to it ever since. So here it is, the unofficial California goat brie anthem: