My co-worker told me that some customers were looking at my book. “Who is that?” one woman asked the other.
“I think he was on one of those island reality shows,” her friend answered.
Assuming they didn’t mean Temptation Island, which Survivor dude do you think they thought I was? Russell? Rob? Richard Hatch? That hippie dude with the overalls?
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You know how sometimes invitations have a dress code? “Business Casual”, “Black Tie’, “Evening Formal”?
I don’t get many invites like those. I am, however, proud to have just received a request to attend a cheese event that listed as a requirement: “Factory Attire”.
I’ll have to get some overalls.
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What’s your favorite Ramones song? Which is the cheesiest?
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By request… I was asked by a few people for a copy of my outline from the California Artisan Cheese Festival distribution panel. This is pretty dry reading, but you asked for it:
(Pictured is a bad sales rep. The tug toy represents pricing)
What I expect in a cheese distributor:
1. Distributor has a rep/contact person who:
– visits the store on a regular basis who
– understands, generally, our store and customers
-has actually looked at our cheese case
-brings samples of new cheese
-makes suggestions that fit our store
-has some level of excitement or energy for cheese (don’t need to entertain me, just has to care about cheese)
-understands cheese basics (I have often had to explain name-control, rBGH, pasteurization etc.)
-is authorized to make deals
-can issue or oversee credits
2. Cheese handling
-regular delivery schedule
-not a lot of shorts
-professional drivers aware of food safety issues (don’t need to know the temp of pasteurization, do need to know not to drop boxes of cheese in floor puddles)
-has warehouse folks who understand the needs of different cheeses and inspect the cheese periodically
-moves product before it goes bad, not after
-gets rid of returned bad products instead of re-selling them
3. Money
-Issues credits in a transparent, timely manner
(doesn’t arbitrarily decide to deny credits, has pick up slips with numbers that actually match something, etc.,)
-sale cheeses actually are on sale when they arrive
4. Favors
-does an occasional favor as long as I don’t abuse.
5. What I don’t want
-Outsiders touching our cheese (retailers who have outside companies re-set cases either have no self-respect or are exploiting the labor of others)
-“deals” on crap (too old, full of preservatives, etc.)
-BS sales talk
-Making things up when they don’t know the answer
-bad cheese
-the same bad cheese on next order
My responsibilities
-Be honest (tell them when I’m dropping big products, bring up problems, etc.)
-return phone calls/emails
-offer price matching
-take special orders that I order
-ask for few favors
-tell them when my schedule changes
-when a distributor has developed a market for cheese, spending money on promotions and education, do not switch to a different distributor when that cheese gets popular and other companies try to move in. Unless there is a good reason.
Doing some cheese research, I came across an “Import Refusal Report” that was pretty gross. However, I came across a word that is perfect to describe certain cheese manufacturing conditions.
Charge(s)
Violation Code Section Charge Statement
FILTHY 402(a)(3), 801(a)(3); ADULTERATION The article appears to consist in whole or in part of a filthy, putrid, or decomposed substance or be otherwise unfit for food.
MFR INSAN 801(a)(1); INSANITARY MANUFACTURING, PROCESSING OR PACKING The article appears to have been manufactured, processed, or packed under insanitary conditions.
Now, I looked it up, and it appears “insanitary” is a real word (so is “unsanitary”, the word I thought was being misspelled when I first read this). It means, unsurprisingly, “so dirty or germ-ridden as to be a danger to health”. However, I really like it as a description of the manufacturing process of a small minority of food producers who don’t seem to get basic food safety issues. As in, your sense of sanitation is INSANE!”
Just wanted to let you fine people know that I will be writing occasionally for the great blog Fair Food Fight. I just posted my first entry, “Local is the new organic co-opted food word” .
Check it out!
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Thanks to everyone who said hi at the Cheese Fest this weekend. I especially love the meeting the parents of friends from high school aspect of North Bay book signings.
I will be posting the notes from my part of the panel after I clean up the spelling and typos. They won’t be thrilling, but hopefully they will be useful.
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So, I kinda promised Laurie this would be a no-cheese vacation, beyond what I brought for us to eat, of course.* However, when I realized we were very close to River’s Edge Chevre, I took a day off working on my new book proposal and went for a visit.
River’s Edge is absolutely one of my favorite American cheese makers. Not many folks are making ripened goat cheese of this quality in the U.S. Plus, they are a tiny, family-run, farmstead cheese operation. What is not to love?
Here are some lovely, young Humbug Mountains. We love these, though the “Up in Smoke” (fresh chevre wrapped in a bourbon-spritzed maple leaf) is the River’s Edge cheese we sell the most.
Pat and her daughter Astraea were super accommodating to let me visit with basically no notice. Pat showed me around, Astraea made us fried-egg sandwiches, and then we ate a bunch of cheese. Without buying direct, my selection has been limited, but every single one of the cheeses were incredible in their own way. The St. Olga and the Astraea – neither of which I had tried for a long time – were tremendous harder, washed-rind cheeses that, honestly, I had forgotten all about.
I was in cheese heaven and they didn’t even have the Mayor of Nye Beach, which is – I think – one of the best 2 or 3 washed rind goat cheeses in the country.
You know what they did have though? A schnauzer.
He was so cute and hairy that I wasn’t 100% sure, so I had to ask. I don’t remember Pat’s exact words, so I am going to make up a quote. “We don’t pretty up our Schnauzers out here in the country. Those foofy haircuts are for soft-pawed, city dogs.”**
Of course, they also had goats, some of the most beautiful milkers this soft-pawed, city boy has ever seen. They are a mature ad well-loved little herd.
We hung out for a while talking about tsunamis, floods, goats, organic dairy, dairy inspectors, and the cheese biz. There was so much good cheese I didn’t want to leave! Still, finally I started my wet drive back to our coastal rental.*** When I got back I discovered something very interesting.
It seems that all schnauzers like River’s Edge Chevre.
*Pt Reyes Toma, French Comte, Australian Cheddar (aged 3 years), Beehive Barely Buzzed, Australian marinated Feta, and a wheel of P’tit Basque.
** Pat totally did not say this. I’m hoping she finds it amusing though.
***Favorite fun-fact of the day. The area we were staying in used to be known as the “Pat Boone Estates” because he was an original developer.
**** For a video of Pat making cheese, check out Cooking Up a Story.
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Tagged cooking up a story, fried egg sandwiches, oregon, river's edge chevre, schnauzers, schnitzel, vacation
Cheese and politics don’t mix. That’s what a bunch of pro-Walker folks e-mailed to tell me after I sent that letter to the Wisconsin Milk Marketing Board.
When I realized we had driven by Humbug Mountain and Nye Beach, I said to Laurie, “I bet River’s Edge Chevre is around here somewhere.” Today I went to visit. I’ll write a full entry when I can upload my pictures, but for now I’ll just say: awesome cheese, awesome people.
Here’s a cheese from River’s Edge at the Texas ACS:
Gordon ("Zola") Edgar 